Wednesday I wore my pants with one of the very nifty salwar tops that Court brought me back from India - the lightweight shirt comes down to my knees pretty much. I was expecting to go to Busunga via motorcycle with Basime, and it's much easier to ride on a motorcycle when wearing pants as opposed to a skirt (especially since Basime drives a *bit* faster now that he has some experience under his belt) - but as I walked by the "bike tree" - a big tree in town under which men fix bicycles and motorcycles – and one of the men yelled "dirty woman, dirty woman" in English (which sounds like “dah-ty woo-mahn, dah-ty woo-mahn” with the accent)...he could only have been talking about me, and I wonder if it was because I was wearing pants...I asked my friend Olupah at the health center and she said he was just making fun of me...that much I'm aware of. And then a bit farther another group of men started making "smooch" noises as I walked by...I don't really know how else to describe really obnoxiously loud lip-smaking kissing sounds...and shouting “hello madam! how are you! I love you! Weh! Weh! (You! You!) And surrounded by laughter and lots of Lubwisi I obviously couldn’t understand.
I don't know if you can imagine the internal monologue I have as this is happening..."Shut the &*@# up! You are so obnoxious! I'm walking down the road, what is the big deal?! I walk this way every day - twice. Is it because of the pants? Or is it just the color of my skin? Is it worth just wearing a skirt so you don't act like this? No, because you do crap like this even when I wear a skirt! I’ve seen Ugandan women wear similar things and not get harassed…so it can’t be the pants…White women have lived here, in this village, and walked this road, for about 20 years! Get used to it! Is it just because you’re male? Are you drunk? What in the world could be your excuse?!”
Certain days they behave worse than others. I guess I’m the same way, certain days I behave worse than others.
People in the minority the world over have experienced behavior like this for centuries I suppose, different words, different skin colors/eye shapes/body shapes/disabilities/deformities/opionions/politics/religions/etc. but I don’t suppose the tone of voice has ever changed…every country I’ve been to, the derogatory tone of voice is unmistakable.
One day, we will only appreciate and love the differences we have amongst ourselves as people. One day I will be able to walk down the road/street/path/boulevard without being harassed. One day our love for one another will be perfect. One day I will love and be loved perfectly.
2 comments:
I am so sorry. Even worse than my own experiences with the gender connotations and character attacks. You are a beautiful daughter of God the most high--may he shut the mouths of those who are confused.
I read this and just felt righteous anger rise up!!! Your perpective is commendable as is your heart and honesty. I'm so, so sorry you are being treated like this.
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